Another Bathroom "What the Heck!" Moment

Earlier this year in May, I did a post about something I took a picture of in the bathroom of the building where I work. Not sure if you remember but I posted about and asked you all, why someone would be eating this certain thing in the bathroom and why they would leave the evidence behind. In case you missed it you can see the picture and the post HERE.

Believe it or not my fine friends...I encountered another "What the Heck!" moment just today!

Now, before I show you the pictures, let me just explain that the reason that I have my cell phone with me when I'm in the bathroom is because during the Great Sciatica Event of 2010, I happened to go the bathroom and somehow the door got jammed and I was stuck inside without my phone and still in intense sciatic pain! Since then I am always sure to have my phone with me so I can dial 911 and get some cute firemen to come rescue me!

And to be totally honest I'm hooked on Angry Birds and find myself with free time in the bathroom so I play a little game.

Anyway...today, relatively free of Sciatica; I went to the bathroom and there in the stall I saw and took a picture of this!

Do you see anything wrong with this picture? Let me see if I can get a close up of it.

Your eyes do not deceive you. That's a plastic FORK! Seriously people. A fork. Sitting on the toilet paper dispenser. It appeared to be unused...but I wasn't about to touch it!!! Who knows what someone was forking with that thing! Ewwww!

So again...why? Let me hear your best made up story of why someone would need a fork in the bathroom! And why they would leave it behind! Unbelievable!

Be the Mule, Not the Ass!

My sister sent me the cutest email today. There's a funny story in it and cute pictures, but if you really pay attention to the moral of the story you will learn so much. Hope you enjoy it.

One day a farmer's donkey fell down into a
well. The animal cried piteously for hours as
the farmer tried to figure out what to do. 

Finally, he decided the animal was old, and the
well needed to be covered up anyway;
it just wasn't worth it to retrieve the donkey.

He invited all his neighbors to come over and
help him. They all grabbed a shovel and began
to shovel dirt into the well. At first, the
donkey realized what was happening and cried
horribly. Then, to everyone's amazement he
quieted down.

A few shovel loads later, the farmer finally
looked down the well. He was astonished at what
he saw. With each shovel of dirt that hit his
back, the donkey was doing something amazing.
He would shake it off and take a step up.

As the farmer's neighbors continued to shovel
dirt on top of the animal, he would shake it
off and take a step up.

Pretty soon, everyone was amazed as the donkey
stepped up over the edge of the well and
happily trotted off! 

Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds
of dirt. The trick to getting out of the well
is to shake it off and take a step up. Each of
our troubles is a stepping stone. We can get out
of the deepest wells just by not stopping,
never giving up! Shake it off and take a step up. 

Remember the five simple rules to be happy:

Free your heart from hatred - Forgive.

Free your mind from worries - Most never happen.

Live simply and appreciate what you have.

Give more.

Expect less 

NOW .......
The donkey later came back,
and bit the farmer who had tried to bury him.
The gash from the bite got infected and
the farmer eventually died in agony from septic shock

MORAL FROM TODAY'S LESSON:

When you do something wrong, and try to cover
your ass, it always comes back to bite you.

Makes you stop and say...Hmmmm, what the heck!?!

Warning....bathroom photos about to be published!!

Not icky ones, just ones that make you wonder about people and what they do in the privacy of those little stalls.

Can you guess what's pictured in the photo below?

Do you need a close up?

Yep...that is a peanut husk....sitting on top of the sanitary napkin receptable....in the bathroom....in the stall! Doesn't it make you wonder? This is a bathroom in the building where I work where dozens of women use the same bathroom.

Why would someone be eating peanuts in the bathroom? And why the need to leave the evidence on top of the sanitary napkin receptable? And why am I taking pictures of it?

Any thoughts? Ideas? Please someone explain this to me!!

Politician's in Hot Water!!!

"Everything is changing. People are taking their comedians seriously and their politicians as a joke." ~ Will Rogers

It seems like our politicians are in hot water, in more ways than one. Just take a look at these cute little tea bags!



I believe that's Hillary Clinton in the cup. And I recognize the first tea bag person; President Obama. Not sure who the others are though. Any guesses? If you like these you can find them and a whole lot of other really cute things at donkey products.

I saw this video on Friday morning while I was getting ready to go to work, but I didn't really pay attention so I didn't notice what the product was.

Today I found the video and I just think it's the oddest, weirdest, freakiest, cutest thing I ever saw. See if you agree.

Iwanna Wednesday

Bet you thought I forgot about Iwanna Wednesday today didn't you? Well never fear, I didn't. But what Iwanna today is not an object, today Iwanna tell you a story, a funny story, a story not for the faint of heart or the squeamish. A story of normal bodily functions and the trials and tribulations of growing older. Now remember, I didn't say of growing OLD...I said of growing OLDER, there is a big difference. All of you 40 and over out there, can I get an AMEN?

About a month ago I went for one of those routine checkups to my regular, normal medical doctor. She's the one that found the cancer originally and I love her to death for saving my life. Dr. Tracey Levens, Mwaaaaaaaaaa *big kiss* to ya!

So she did the pap smear, the breast exam, the growling and grumbling about my weight. She asked me to contact my insurance to see if they cover Pneumonia shots (which I still haven't done). She asked me to get my living will to her (this is about the 4th time that she has asked for this and she has yet to get it, you think she would get the hint..I'm not planning on dying!)

She gave me paperwork to schedule my mammogram and then she gave me the oddest thing! This is what Iwanna tell you about. She gave me a home, whew...can I really say it? Or even type it? Remember...I warned you! She gave me a "home stool sample kit"!

Oh yes she did!! She handed me a small box, and she explained to me that inside the box was a sheet of paper which I had to stretch across my toilet bowl and do my thing (oh the indignity!). She didn't go into too much detail from there, probably because of the look of amazement/disgust on my face. She said further directions were in the box and to just do the test and there was a smaller box in there to mail it all back to them, or...and get this, I could just bring it by the office and hand it to the girl at the front desk!

Now...I hope you know what a stool is? No Virginia, it's not one of these. . .

It's one of these (and in the interest of keeping myself from gagging and also from having my computer pull up distasteful fetish porn sites, I looked up FAKE POOP, so this is a picture of FAKE POOP.) (Still pretty darn gross though, am I right?)

Well a month later I still hadn't done it, I had opened the box and read the instructions and it gagged me so much I couldn't do it. But unfortunately I received a letter in the mail from my doctor, and it read:

WE HAVE NOT RECEIVED BACK THE STOOL KIT GIVEN AT YOUR PHYSICAL 4/21/2009. PLEASE TAKE THE TIME TO DO THE TEST AND RETURN KIT BACK TO OUR OFFICE. THANK YOU. . .

Now those dot.dot.dot's. . . after that comment were actually typed at the end of the statement and I know what they mean...they're medical jargon for LOL! I know it, they're still laughing at me as they realize I have to poop on paper and collect a sample for them, Grrrrrrrrr!!!

Anyway, yesterday I finally got brave enough to do the test. I placed this long strip of paper that had two little tape strips at either end, on my toilet seat. It was about 5 inches wide. Then I prepared the little sampler thingy (I believe that is the proper medical term, thank you very much!) So I have my sampler thingy ready, which looks something like this...

So I sit and I wait. Now I don't know about you, but anytime I sit down to, how can I put this delicately, when I sit down to "relieve my bowels", (yuk) I always have to pee first, but you can't pee, it's not allowed, so this was harder than you think.

Anyway, I do my thing and you can't wipe cause there's this object taped to your toilet blocking the way and if you wipe and tear it off then the poop falls into the bowl rendering said poop unusable and soiled. what? huh? what?

So I stand up, (please don't picture this in your head, please, please, please). I stand up and get this little sampler thingy which you saw pictured earlier and you have to stab it 5, yes 5...not 4, not 6, but 5 times into your "sample".

Then you take said sampler thingy and put it into the glass tube that has liquid in it and you seal it and shake it up. (Now remember, at this point I have not wiped yet...ugh!!!)

Then you take this tube that encloses your poop and you place it into a zip lock baggie thingy. Then you take the zip lock baggie thingy and place it into an envelope which then goes into a box which is then sealed and ready to be mailed or taken by HAND to the doctors office.

The final package looks something like this...

So yesterday morning, my sister Lisa comes to get me and unbeknownst to her... I have poopy in my pursy :-)

I finally explained to her what I did and told her I needed to drop it off at my doctors office. She told me we could go on our lunch hour and then grab some lunch after, (like I had an appetite after all that!)

But alas, my doctor's office is closed during the lunch hour and they don't have a poopy drop-off slot in their door! So the poopy came home with me and I told Lisa I would drop it off the next morning and just be late for work. So all day long I had this poopy with me, and I had a poopy day as well. Coincidence? Hmmmm, I wonder.

So the poopy came home with me and this morning Lisa told me, "Instead of being late, let me just put some postage on it, I have some at the office and then you don't have to stress about it". She's a real, Let's-get-it-done kind of person. So as I got off the car I handed her my poopy envelope for her to put postage on and mail.

Now I know this has been a long, long post. But I hope you stuck with me and read every word because what Iwanna really tell you is the text conversation Lisa and I had a bit later that morning:

Me to Lisa: 7:45a.m.
Thank you for the pie. I know you like it when I say thank you.

Lisa to me: 8:25a.m.
Whatever smartass, by the way, the poop is in the mail.

Me to Lisa: 8:26a.m.
Thank you taking care of my shit for me.

Lisa to me: 8:27a.m.
Lol you funny man, woman!

I crack my self up!
Lisa cracks me up!
Lisa cracks herself up!
Mailing poopy cracks me up!
Needless to say, today was not a poopy day at all!
And Lisa and I had a good laugh all day long. I hope you have a good laugh as well.
Hope you enjoyed the story Iwanna'd to tell you and that you felt it was appropriate for Iwanna Wednesday.

Weird Sitings on the Road

Back in October my sister took a picture of this on the commute home from work. We thought it was pretty weird. Recently we've seen another weird object that is unexplainable to us and we've tried to take pictures as we drive by with no luck.

This Saturday while I was out by myself thrift shopping, I drove over to where this object is and took these pictures for my sister. A winged horse? He's beautiful and someone obviously took a lot of time to make him...it's driving us crazy why. Lisa says she's going to call them up and ask, so if she does I'll let you know what he's going to be used for. Righ now he's just the Guardian of Route 99 in Bakersfield.

Not sure what this was made for or what it's going to be used for...but it's so beautiful. I love it!

Weird Shoes I Stumbled Upon

I think I've mentioned before this cool little program called StumbleUpon. You simply download the program and install the toolbar into your browser, super simple. Then you personalize to the things you are interested in from a whole list of different things. For instance I personalized with things I am interested in such as:
Cooking
Food
Crafts
Humor
Catholic
Women
Health
Fashion
Clothing
Shopping
Puzzles
Quizzes, etc...you get the picture right? So then whenever I want to I simply click on the STUMBLE button in my toolbar and the Great God the of Web will locate a website it thinks I would be interested in depending on my choices. So I may get a really cool website about blond jokes or word puzzles or Bible Verse of the Day, etc etc. So if I like that website then I click on the "I like it" button and I will get more websites similar to that one. If I don't like it then I click on the "thumbs down" button and I won't get anymore like that one.

The reason for me going into such detail is twofold

1. I think you should download StumbleUpon

2. I want to show you something I StumbledUpon just today at this website...

Can you believe these shoes? And there are other ones to view if you click the link above! But these two were definitely the weirdest. See StumbleUpon knows that one of the interests I have is in fashion and that's probably why they showed me this website or could it be my interest in humor? Or maybe it's a puzzle...how do you get the flies inside the shoe to feed the live tarantula without it biting you? Go see the rest of these and you decide! Ugh!

Day One in Captivity

This does not bode well for me. It's only day one...and not even a full day because I got home at 4pm and it's only 6:35. So it's day one and already I'm fantasizing and writing about men I love! But then who doesn't love Matt? I mean really!

Anyway...why captivity? What the heck am I talking about? Well today was day one of the I-131 Ablation Radioactive Iodine Treatment for my Thyroid Cancer. About June of 2008 during a routine breast exam my doctor noticed a lump in my throat...it turned into a whole ordeal and you can read about it here and here and here and also right here. There's gory details, pictures and fun for all! Yipee!

So part of the treatment for Thyroid Cancer, besides ripping the thyroid right out of you is this radioactive iodine treatment. And that's what I had done today.

Leading up to today, I've been off of the medication, Synthyroid (a pill I will have to take every single day for the rest of my life) for about 6 weeks. They take you off of it and then have to wait for it all to be out of your system and for something called a TSH level to be at 30. So that means that every day that your off your pill you get sicker and sicker and sicker...ain't thyroid cancer grand?

I was actually kind of lucky in that I didn't get very sick, but then again my TSH level didn't get as high as they wanted as quickly as they wanted. The first blood test I took put my TSH level at 19.2, then 2 weeks later it was at 22.4. About this time they were looking to other options, such as two injections that would make me really sick, really fast and raise my TSH level to where it needed to be...luckily this wasn't necessary as the 3rd time was the charm and the 3rd blood test showed my level to be at 37.77. I took that blood test on Thursday, last week and on Friday I had an appointment with my Endocrinologist, Dr. Catania.

Dr. Catania was thrilled that my level was where it was and said we need to get this done A-SAP, how bout Monday? Wow, I wasn't ready for that...but then again I was because on of the side effects that I did experience in getting sicker and sicker was an intense itching all over and in different areas of my body. Like say my wrist would itch, it would just itch like the biggest mosquito in the world had bitten me and I would scratch it. The second I scratch these little welts and bumps show up and then it itches even more and I scratch or rub or dab Cortaid on it and then it just stops...and starts all over again...someplace else, Arghhhhhhhhhh!

So that's what I was up to today. I went to a Radiologist who took some readings of my body with a Geiger counter. I think that was just in case I was born radioactive they would know how high the radioactiveness I normally am would be measured before they nuked me some more. They then took me into this little lead lined room, about the size of a small walk in closet and there's a little item that looks like a Size D battery and the top comes off and the little pill is inside and no one but you can touch it! They just turn the little holder that is aptly named Lil Piglet over and the radioactive capsule about the size of a Contac cold capsule comes out and they give you a glass of water and you suck it down. I tried to locate a photo of a Lil Piglet or Lil Pig and you can google radioactive iodine holder and see a photo of it but when you click on it...it mysteriously says Webpage cannot be found, hmmmm.

I even went so far as to type in Nuclear Supplies and was unable to open any of those websites either, but I expect the FBI or the CIA or the FTC or some lettered agency to break my door down any minute and arrest me! So I best hurry to finish this post.

Anyway, they send my radioactive ass merrily on it's way telling me not to dilly dally in the waiting room, huh? what? huh? Dilly dally? in the waiting room? I've never done that even when I wasn't radioactive.

So I drive home and for the next 7 days...I have to remain locked up here. Dismissed, unwanted and unloved by all humanity :0(

So I'm gonna have lots and lots and lots and did I mention LOTS of time to blog...lucky you, my faithful readers. That means you April and Lisa!

Stay tuned....

How to spend a Sick Day

Today I stayed home sick from work. Something I ate yesterday kept me up all night singing praise to the Porcelain God. I got very little sleep, so even though I felt kind of ok in the morning, I was really tired and knew that it was going to be tough getting through the day. So I stayed home! A 3-day weekend, Whoooo hoooo!

I got plenty of sleep, paid some bills online, shredded a whole bunch of crap and found some really unique items on some really unique websites.

On Pooktre Tree Shapers I found some really unique “tree furniture. Such as the chair below. Some people have so much creativeness (is that even a word?) and patience. I know I couldn't do this. Follow their link if you want to see more.

This website features a photographer by the name of Nick Brandt. Nick’s photographs are of Africa and feature lots of zebras, lions, cheetahs, elephants and monkeys. There's a pic of a monkey actually posing. Nick says this about his photography, “My images are unashamedly idyllic and romantic, a kind of enchanted Africa. They’re my elegy to a world that is steadily, tragically vanishing.”

My favorite photo was this one. It really is idyllic and romantic and ethereal as well.

Ok, this one I love but have no use for as my kids are too old now for me to tie their shoes and I hardly ever wear shoes with ties, usually only when I play tennis. But "How to tie your Shoelaces" shows some really unique ways to lace up shoes, check it out, here’s a sample.

And at The Size of our World I was well…amazed at the size of our world. Makes you wonder about whether these is life on other planets since most of them are so much larger than Earth!

And if it boggles your mind too much to think about the grandness of the galaxy, perhaps this website is more your cup of tea. I tried to place all the states where they’re supposed to be, but pretty much I only know where the original 13 colonies are, California, Arizona, Texas, Florida, Alabama and Oregon are. Sad and pathetic I know.

Last but not least I found this amazing baker/artist at Mike's Amazing Cakes. They really do make the most amazing cakes, just like the one below.


Next time you have a sick day, go check out all these websites and tell me what you think.

Things you see in the course of the Day

Do you ever just see something in the course of living everyday life and just say, "What the heck?" Well that happened to me and Lisa yesterday when we were commuting home on Hwy 99. We saw this:

"What the heck?" Just rolling along on the freeway is this guy in a truck with a trailer that was pulling these two deers. I don't know if they're plastic or cast iron or what, but why would you have these? What would they be used for? Heck if I know, but is was kinda cool to see.

The next 3 pictures I took with my camera during my lunch hour when Lisa and I were in a parking lot eating our sack lunch since it was a nice day. She noticed the tree coming out of the building and kinda blending in with the mirrored reflection on the building. These are awesome aren't they? She's so observant!