Showing posts with label Thyroid. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Thyroid. Show all posts

Monday, June 22, 2009

Doctor's Appointments

I had two doctors appointments this morning. Now you know how graphic I can get about doctors appointments and procedures...I warn you ahead of time.

The first doctor was my endocrinologist. An endocrinologist is a specially trained doctor who diagnoses and treats diseases that affect your glands and hormone levels (endocrine system) such as:
Adrenal Disorders
Diabetes
Lipid Disorders
Osteoporosis
Pituitary Disorders
Parathyroid and Calcium Disorders
PCOS, infertility
Thyroid Disorders ...which is my disorder and why I see one.

The second doctor was my surgeon, and well, I guess you know what surgeons do, except this one did it twice; cut me open I mean.
So I thought I would show you a picture of my two doctors. . .

First my endocrinologist. Capable looking guy isn't he? He can manage any of my disorders anytime!
And this is my surgeon. Definitely a man you would trust to take a knife to your throat isn't he?
Ok, Ok...I know. These are those two doctors from Greys Anatomy, a show I absolutely adore for many different reasons. The two McDreamy, McSteamy guys shown above being two reasons why I adore the show, mmmmmmmm, yummy!

So why did I lie and try to pass off these two gorgeous men as my doctors? Well because today's doctors visits consisted of the endocrinologist and the surgeon (both during different appointments, one at 8am and one at 9am) massaging and palpitating my neck and shoulder area gently with their bare hands. And do you think that when I closed my eyes, (cause to be frank, it felt pretty damn good) I thought about the actual real life doctors? No way Jose! I thought about those two doctors up above. It was worth the $275 a piece that I paid today!

A girl can dream can't she?

I can't wait til next Monday when I have a mammogram scheduled. Let's see what doctor or x-ray technician I conjure up for that one! Stay tuned.

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Iwanna Wednesday

Welcome to Iwanna Wednesday where you get to see what's inside of the brain of the woman that Iwanna's everything!

I spent the last week at home due to radioactive iodine treatment for Thyroid Cancer and most of the whole week I spent looking at the wall behind my computer, which is also the same wall behind my TV, so basically...I spent the whole week just staring at this wall that has no pictures on it, nothing. Just a plain white canvas.

But Iwanna knows what Iwanna wants this wall to look like...check this out

I love this! I want the whole wall to look like that and where you see that desk is where my computer desk would be and then I would want it to extend a little further to the right and have another area there where my TV would fit. Then I could display all my Iwanna treasures to my hearts content.

Yep...Iwanna this!

Sunday, March 1, 2009

Captivity ~ Day Six

Well today is my last day in Captivity. Tomorrow I have a doctor's appoint at around noon where they will do some type of a full body scan and check the radiation level in my system and then if all is good I can return to work Tuesday morning.

I gotta say, I had a great time being home. Even though I didn't feel 100%, 100% of the time, I still felt pretty good most of the time. I just wish I had been able to go out and do something fun. It was hard being home all week knowing that I couldn't just go over to my mom and dad's house and just hang out with them or go shopping with my mom.

But hopefully all this is behind me now and I won't even have to do this again. And I do have one more week's vacation so maybe I can head to Vegas or something exciting.

I want to thank everyone that made this so much easier for me. My mommy and daddy who called me every day and brought me milk and migas and chili beans and took in my poor homeless son Jim and fed him and cared for him. I want to thank my daughter April who texted me almost every night and sometimes during the day to see if I needed anything. My son Jim who also called me everyday and drove my car so the gas wouldn't get old in it :0) and who also brought me paintbrushes and delivered the chili beans. My sister Lisa who let me sleep late every morning and didn't call me to chat on her way to work the way we are used to, but who did call me around 9am just to make sure I did wake up that day. She also bought me vacuum cleaner bags, red potatoes and a red bell pepper which she knows is my fav! Thanks to my brother Fred for the daily phone calls and the Sweetarts, Pixy Stix and Macadamia nuts. Thanks to my nieces and nephews that texted me with sweet messages and offered to bring by anything I wanted and needed as long as they could just leave it on the front porch, :0)

Thanks to my sister in law Connie for texting me and making me laugh. Thanks to my coworker and friend Angelica for calling me and bitching about the office and for missing me terribly. If I forgot anyone know that what you did, the thoughts, the prayers have been greatly appreciated by me.

I have a plan already and if tomorrow they release me and tell me I'm no longer radioactive I'm heading for the Discovery Store and to my favorite Goodwill store! I can hardly wait!

Friday, February 27, 2009

Captivity ~ Day Five

Well it's Friday. The last day of my vacation so to speak. Today did get a little bit boring. I did my dishes, cleaned up around the house a little bit. Decided to do my Modge Podge Plate project and realized I didn't have a brush. So I watched Gran Torino with Clint Eastwood.

I have always loved Clint Eastwood. He is the coolest man God ever made. And this movie was no exception. Even though they made him wear old man pants pulled up to his nipples like Erckle/Irkcle? he still looked like the man I would must trust in the whole world if I had to get out of a deadly situation alive. I love his droll sense of humor. Watch it...it's good.

So then my son went to the 99cent store and bought me some sponge brushes and I started on my project! Yipee! I took pictures, but I'm not going to post them until the whole thing is complete. I hope it turns out well. I made them several years ago. I made one for each of my sister in laws, Connie and Norma and one for my sister Lisa and I never ever saw them displayed anywhere! So now I'm making two for me. One with a grape design for my kitchen since I'm trying to do grapes in there and you can't find a grape decorator plate anywhere, and another one with butterflies and flowers that I want to hang in my room, but it may look better in the bathroom.

I actually went outside today and got some more sun....it was great. Being in an office without a window all day is really something I am not looking forward to returning to next week. :0(

I even got to see my mom for about 10 seconds while she dropped off a gallon of milk and some Migas. And my sister came by for another 10 seconds and picked up some movies. So it was a good day, but I'm going a little stir crazy and while I don't want to go back to work, I sure do miss the stores!

And mom...the Migas were great!

Thursday, February 26, 2009

Captivity ~ Day Four

Weirdest thing is that yesterday and again today when I woke up I have this raspy, 6 pack of cigarettes a day voice...and I don't smoke! I think it's because when I lay down all the radioactive iodine lodges itself in my throat and chest and I don't even realize it til that first phone call of the day which today was my sister because there's no one here when I wake up so I don't talk until the phone rings. Tonight I'm going to try sleeping sitting up on pillows like I did for about a month after my surgery.

I swear I had so many plans with what I was going to do during this week of being home and tomorrow is my last real day because the weekend is just a normal weekend and I always have Saturday and Sunday off and Monday I have to go back to the doctor for the full body scan and the Geiger check and then hopefully Tuesday it's back to work.

Here's a list of what I wanted to get done:
1. Clean my flower beds (hula-ho them)
2. Modge Podge Plate Craft
3. Finish blue and gold afghan I've been crocheting since my daughter was a freshman in high school...she's now 27.
4. Crochet the little beer caps I've been saving for my crocheted grape project.
5. Wash my kitchen and bathroom curtains
6. Iron my new green blouse and black striped pants
7. Sew the binding back around my favorite tv-watching blanket.

Now here's what I did get done off that list:
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ummmm, none of it :0(

But I did:
1. Write a post everyday on my blog
2. Read all of 2009 and 2008 posts on my new fav blog dooce.com
3. Clean top of Fridge
4. Sort through bowls and put some in the yard sale pile
5. Finish books 1 thru 3 of the Twilight Saga
6. Watched The Curious Case of Benjamin Button (loved it! and love Brad, *sigh*)
7. Watched Paul Blart - Mall Cop (no *sigh*, just watched it out of love for Kevin James)
8. Sat outside in the sun Today and Tuesday
9. Took several naps
10. Cleaned out my Yahoo inbox

So there you go. I have accomplished some things.
and...
I still have tomorrow.

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Captivity ~ Day Three

Well I made it! I lived through the night and now Day Three is almost over. I will admit it was a rough night. The lump in my throat grew a little more and then around 2am I went to the bathroom and noticed I was having a hard time breathing and that there was some bubbling and rumbling in my chest when I did breathe. It kinda scared me, but I took an Aleve and went back to bed cause that's how I roll...I don't sweat it and stay up all night worrying...I had dreams to catch up on.

So this morning I woke up and it's really sore and swollen and all red like I have sunburn on my throat and collarbone and the area right underneath. So I had some eggs and coffee. Food seems to be my answer to everything lately! Then of course I called my sister who told me to call my doctor. I called my mom, who told me to call my doctor. So I called my doctor and apparently all this is quite normal and I need to quit my whining and take an Aleve for the pain and drink more water.

So that's what I did today. I just laid around and sat around reading and playing computer games. I tried to go sit outside again today like I did yesterday but even though the sun was out there was a really cool breeze so I had to come back inside. Now I'm just killing time posting this til American Idol comes on because for some reason this week it's on Wednesday and Thursday instead of Tuesday and Wednesday.

I also wanted to share with you how wonderful my brother Fred is. I will admit, there have been many, many, many, MANY! times in my life that I have wanted to kill him. But Fred has always been there to help me or my kids. He's the one the insisted on coming to my surgery because as he put it, "Sometimes you don't wake up from surgery."Comforting, no?

Well he called me a bit ago to see how I was feeling and I whined cause really what else can I do? And who deserves the right to whine more than someone who has cancer? I know, me huh? So he told me that he had bought me some Pixy Stix and Sweetarts and he would bring them by my house and hang them on the mailbox and run for the hills before I nuked him :0)

And he did. And the greatest thing is that he knows what my favorite candies are. He actually somewhere along the way stored that little tidbit about me in his sweet little head. And...he also threw in a bag of California Gourmet all natural macadamia nuts! I love macadamia nuts! I'm debating saving them to bake at a later date into cookies that I can share with my dear little brother, or I could just open the bag and toss a bunch into a bowl of vanilla ice cream.

Want to make bets on which one I'm going to do?
Thank you Fred, You're the Best!

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Captivity ~ Day Two

Today started out pretty good, but it's not ending up so great.

I got up fairly early and decided I would do a super duper job of cleaning my house so that I could enjoy being in it the rest of the week. I had Frosted Flakes and Bananas and toast for breakfast. I had really been craving cereal mostly because it dairy products were on my list of foods I couldn't eat prior to the radioactive iodine treatment. It was yummy!

So then I proceeded to put towels in to wash. I sorted through my bowls and put a ton of them in the yard sale pile and just kept the ones I really use or really love. I have a thing about bowls you see. I did dishes and cleaned the top of my fridge which was icky and where does that stuff come from? I don't find it anywhere in my whole kitchen, only on top of the fridge. It's sticky and greasy and brown and yucky! I sprayed it with Windex while I did the dishes and it came right off slicker than snot!

So I swept and mopped my kitchen and dusted my living room and knick knacks and then went to go vacuum but my vacuum cleaner bag was full and I threw it away because I knew I had another one, but alas, I didn't! I called my sister to see if she would go out into the real world. The real world that I am banished from, during her lunch hour and see if she could get me a Size U Eureka bag. She told me that she just sticks her hand in the little hole and dumps out all the stuff inside and pulls it out with her hands (and then she wonders why she has allergies?). And I'm thinking how disgusting and cheap. I mean between her and her husband they easily make over $230,000,000 per year...Lisa, you can afford a vacuum cleaner bag! (Well maybe not now because she bought them for me, so there goes $1/2 a mil!)

So since I didn't have a vacuum cleaner I Sharked my house. Then I prepared myself a lovely lunch of a Tuna Fish Sandwich with tuna, lettuce (cut up like my brother Fred cuts it), Chopped jalapenos, sweet pickle relish, mayo, Lawry's Seasoning Salt and Black pepper. Mmmmm, it was so delish. And I took it out onto my patio because the sun was shining and bluebirds were building nests in my tree and bees were buzzing and I had my New Moon by Stephenie Meyer book to read and it was sooooooooo wonderful. My first thought when I sat down and felt the sun warm my skin was, "Life is Good, when you have Cancer". Weird I know, but every cloud has a silver lining right? Otherwise, how do we get through the day?

Well so far your probably wondering how a day this wonderful could end badly. Well after lunch and after doing another load of towels, I started getting really cold and tried to take a nap on the couch but it wasn't warm enough so I turned on the electric blanket in my bed and lied down to read and I took a brief nap. Well when I woke up my throat really HURT. Not inside, like a normal sore throat, but outside, under my ears and chin, like someone had tried to choke me while I was napping. And my throat was a little swollen right under my chin.

So I got up and sucked on a lemon, thinking that maybe the radioactive iodine wasn't supposed to be there and sucking on a lemon activates your salivary glands and I was hoping that would help. It didn't, so I ate a banana and watch tv. And about an hour ago I checked my neck again and now there's like this lump the size of a goiter at the base of my throat right above the section where your collar bone meets.

So I WebMD'd and googled and I guess it's normal, but now I'm scared its going to stay that way forever (although I know it's not) and I'm sucking lemons like a crazy person and drinking so much water I may as well sleep on the toilet and well I took an Aleve and ate another tuna sandwich and sat down to post this and if you don't hear from me tomorrow it will be because the lump kept growing and eventually blocked off my breathing tube and I died. Ok, so that's not really going to happen, but now you have to come back tomorrow just to see if I lived right?

Monday, February 23, 2009

Day One in Captivity

This does not bode well for me. It's only day one...and not even a full day because I got home at 4pm and it's only 6:35. So it's day one and already I'm fantasizing and writing about men I love! But then who doesn't love Matt? I mean really!

Anyway...why captivity? What the heck am I talking about? Well today was day one of the I-131 Ablation Radioactive Iodine Treatment for my Thyroid Cancer. About June of 2008 during a routine breast exam my doctor noticed a lump in my throat...it turned into a whole ordeal and you can read about it here and here and here and also right here. There's gory details, pictures and fun for all! Yipee!

So part of the treatment for Thyroid Cancer, besides ripping the thyroid right out of you is this radioactive iodine treatment. And that's what I had done today.

Leading up to today, I've been off of the medication, Synthyroid (a pill I will have to take every single day for the rest of my life) for about 6 weeks. They take you off of it and then have to wait for it all to be out of your system and for something called a TSH level to be at 30. So that means that every day that your off your pill you get sicker and sicker and sicker...ain't thyroid cancer grand?

I was actually kind of lucky in that I didn't get very sick, but then again my TSH level didn't get as high as they wanted as quickly as they wanted. The first blood test I took put my TSH level at 19.2, then 2 weeks later it was at 22.4. About this time they were looking to other options, such as two injections that would make me really sick, really fast and raise my TSH level to where it needed to be...luckily this wasn't necessary as the 3rd time was the charm and the 3rd blood test showed my level to be at 37.77. I took that blood test on Thursday, last week and on Friday I had an appointment with my Endocrinologist, Dr. Catania.

Dr. Catania was thrilled that my level was where it was and said we need to get this done A-SAP, how bout Monday? Wow, I wasn't ready for that...but then again I was because on of the side effects that I did experience in getting sicker and sicker was an intense itching all over and in different areas of my body. Like say my wrist would itch, it would just itch like the biggest mosquito in the world had bitten me and I would scratch it. The second I scratch these little welts and bumps show up and then it itches even more and I scratch or rub or dab Cortaid on it and then it just stops...and starts all over again...someplace else, Arghhhhhhhhhh!

So that's what I was up to today. I went to a Radiologist who took some readings of my body with a Geiger counter. I think that was just in case I was born radioactive they would know how high the radioactiveness I normally am would be measured before they nuked me some more. They then took me into this little lead lined room, about the size of a small walk in closet and there's a little item that looks like a Size D battery and the top comes off and the little pill is inside and no one but you can touch it! They just turn the little holder that is aptly named Lil Piglet over and the radioactive capsule about the size of a Contac cold capsule comes out and they give you a glass of water and you suck it down. I tried to locate a photo of a Lil Piglet or Lil Pig and you can google radioactive iodine holder and see a photo of it but when you click on it...it mysteriously says Webpage cannot be found, hmmmm.

I even went so far as to type in Nuclear Supplies and was unable to open any of those websites either, but I expect the FBI or the CIA or the FTC or some lettered agency to break my door down any minute and arrest me! So I best hurry to finish this post.

Anyway, they send my radioactive ass merrily on it's way telling me not to dilly dally in the waiting room, huh? what? huh? Dilly dally? in the waiting room? I've never done that even when I wasn't radioactive.

So I drive home and for the next 7 days...I have to remain locked up here. Dismissed, unwanted and unloved by all humanity :0(

So I'm gonna have lots and lots and lots and did I mention LOTS of time to blog...lucky you, my faithful readers. That means you April and Lisa!

Stay tuned....

Saturday, September 20, 2008

My House in Order


I spent the day putting my house in order since this Monday I return to work again. Ever since the first surgery on August 21st I had not been to the grocery store or to Walmart to pickup household items. The cupboards were getting pretty skimpy, not to mention the fridge. It really tired me out though and I'm worried about going to work on Monday, but I'm taking my own car instead of commuting in with my sister in case I get too tired and have to come home...we shall see.


Tuesday, September 16, 2008

The aftermath, not of Ike but of Shariat

No, I'm not talking about the aftermath of Hurricane Ike, I'm talking about Hurricane Shariat...Dr. Shariat to be precise! He really kicked my butt and left me reeling.

Ferocious Hurricane Shariat ripped off the old scars on my throat on Thursday, September 11th and scrambled to remove the right side of my thyroid. Shariat bore down on the right side after raging just a few weeks earlier on the left side and leaving a devastating scar. "This last assault was quite severe," said Alicia resident of the throat area devastated by Shariat. "There is a lot of pain and nausea. The throat and nerves and muscle in the surrounding area are being damaged and my energy level is coming down."

OK, so just a little exaggeration about my surgery using a current event, Hurricane Ike. The devastation Ike left is very serious, but then again so is the devastation of my 2nd surgery as witnessed by the two photos that follow. I warn you the photo's you are about to view may be extremely disturbing and viewer discretion is advise :-)

Not really. I mean they're not beautiful, but they're not THAT bad. Judge for yourself. If you're thinking when you view these photos that it looks painful...that's because it IS!



As bad as these photos look, this scar will not even be noticeable unless you are looking for it and know the person has had this type of surgery.

I'm not going to go into detail anymore about the surgery, recovery, etc. Suffice it to say that it wasn't fun and it's not anything I ever want to go through again, but other than maybe posting some pictures later of my healing I just want to get over it and go on with my life!

I've had a lot of support during all of this and I just want to say thank you to everyone that was there for me and with me during the surgery, my daughter April, my sister Lisa, my mom Tomasa, my dad Federico, my brother Fred, my brother-in-law Sean, my aunt & godmother Casimera, my brother Jaime, and my son Jim. I want to thank my many visitors, both in the hospital and at home, my sister-in-law Connie, my niece Sarena, my nieces Alicia and Beatriz and Melissa, my nephew Freddie, my sister-in-law Norma, my friend Angelica, and my nephew Isaac. Thanks also to my many relatives who prayed for me and put me on prayer lists in their church and sent cards and flowers. Special thanks to Tia Ninfa for the beautiful card and the oracion and photo of Nuestra Senora de la Salud.

A special thank you to my wonderful mommy who just drove up like clockwork to fix me breakfast and just take care of me. There are no words to describe how wonderful, loving and self-less my mother is. I love you mom!

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

What? Surgery again?

Yep, that's right, dammit! I haven't even finished completing my harrowing tale of the last surgery and Monday when I went to the doctor he told me he has to do the surgery again and take out the whole thyroid and the rest of the masses that are there. I think there are three. He said the lab results show that it is cancerous so it's all got to come out. And my incision from the last time was just starting to heal!!!

So here I go again! Tomorrow at 7am it all starts again. At least this time I know what I'm getting into. Last time I was pretty worried about pain afterwards and how bad it would be, but now I know about those happy drugs that they give you in the hospital!

Well, I guess we'll just have to wait til I get back home and then hopefully I can finish the tale of the last surgery and start in on the new one.

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Is My Energy Level Back? (Part Two)

When we last heard from me in the continuing saga (see... http://calangel58.blogspot.com/2008/08/is-my-energy-level-back-part-one.html ) I had gone through all the testing and the doctor had told me surgery was now a reality and the date was scheduled. My family still didn't know at this point, only my sister because well frankly, I tell her everything. I didn't want anyone worrying prematurely or asking me everyday, have you talked to the doctor? what did he say? how are you feeling? etc, etc.

So the family gets told. One funny but cute and sweet thing that was said was by my brother Fred. I was talking to him on the phone giving him the date of the surgery when he said he was going to take the day off. I told him that wasn't necessary, I would be ok and I knew my mom and dad, my sister and my kids were going to be there. My brother replied, "No Alicia, I have to be there, you never know, sometimes people just don't wake up after surgery". I mean if you think about it, if I wasn't worried by then I sure would be worried after having someone tell me I might not wake up :-) But I knew he meant it in a good way, not to scare me but to let me know that if that day was going to be my last one on this earth, he was going to share it with me and with my family. I love you brother!

My mom was a big comfort because she had already been through this and had her complete thyroid taken out. Thankfully she's been fine ever since then. So I knew that I was going to be ok too. But I still worried, especially about my kids and what would happen to them if I died.

My sister Lisa commutes with me to work everyday, so we have 30 minutes in the morning and in the evening to talk during the drive. My poor sister, I kept her crying coming and going because I would tell her what I wanted or what needed to be done if I did die! We talked about what kind of funeral I wanted and what clothes I wanted to be buried in. I'm sorry sis, but I knew you would take care of everything. Love you lots too.

So, I tell my coworkers and let them know that I will more than likely be back to work on Wednesday of the following week as the surgeon says it won't take more than a couple of days to recuperate. They schedule the surgery at 5am! 5am...why in the heck would anyone want to get operated on at 5am? Well I didn't know it but actually the surgery was scheduled for 7:30am, the patient just has to get there early for all the pre-op junk.

I get to the hospital with my entourage and things moved pretty fast. They did the blood pressure checking thing, temperature check, blood sugar check and pulse. I was fine so they tell me it's time to go up to the pre-op room and that there is a waiting room there for my family. We start to go to the elevator when the nurse tells us that there is another family coming with us. At the elevator there is a man in a bed and his wife...oh wait, I forgot to mention this part earlier. We'll come back to the elevator story in a second...

Earlier while they were doing all their checking, they asked me if I had an Advanced Health Care Directive. This is a form that (1) lets you name another individual as agent to make health care decisions for you if you become incapable of making them yourself; (2) lets you give specific instructions about any aspect of your health care, whether or not you appoint an agent. Choices are provided for you to express your wishes regarding the provision, withholding, or withdrawal of treatment to keep you alive, as well as the provision of pain relief. Well I didn't have the directive, so they give you a copy and tell you that it must be witnessed by two other random people, it can't be anyone you are related to or any employee of the health care facility you are at. So the nurse suggested I just ask people in the waiting room! Ummm, just random strangers? How do you just walk up to random strangers and tell them you need them to witness your signature on a document this important? It's quite easy actually because that is what I did, and the two ladies that were in the waiting room that morning were ok with it. The ladies were Cindy and Sarah, God Bless those ladies! They witnessed my signature, signed the form, with their names, addresses and phone numbers...I assume that information was necessary in case anyone fought against the directives I had requested. Those poor, unsuspecting ladies might actually have had to go to court and verify their signature and their part in all this...amazing! Either they weren't thinking that far ahead or at 5:30am no one really pays attention :-)

But anyway....back to the Elevator. Remember I said there is a man in a bed there and his wife? Well guess who his wife is? It's the same lady...Sarah...that signed my advanced directive. Small world isn't it. We all pile into the elevator, which was a tight fit with a bed, a nurse, the wife Sarah, my mom and dad, my daughter, my sister and my brother. The man looks up at all these Mexicans standing around his bed and my brother says, "We're all here for you brother". It was a touching and yet funny as heck moment. We all laughed and felt much better and we found out he was having a quadruple heart bypass or something like that, however many bypasses there are...he was having the limit.

We all pile out of the elevator and the nurse takes us all up to the pre-op section and points out the waiting room for the families. I start to walk off following the nurse and my sister grabs me to hug me and she's crying and I tell her, "don't worry, I'll be right back", (I have not a clue yet what's going on). The nurse says, "no, you're not coming back, they will see you after recovery". The good thing about being clueless is it didn't give me much time for big, tearful goodbyes. It was just a quick hug, love you's and see you in a while! I follow the nurse and Mr. Heart Bypass man and off we go.

This is the real pre-op room. My nurse there gives me a plastic bag with a gown and booties, she asks me to remove ALL my clothes, including underwear, put my shoes in the smaller plastic bag and then put all my clothes in the bigger plastic bag and then lie down on the bed and she will be back to put in my IV. (Honestly...why do you have to remove your panties? Do you know how naked and uncomfortable it is to not wear panties? Yuk!)

So she comes and puts in my IV smooth as silk. I say this because it took three nurses some 5 tries to get the IV in Mr. Heart Bypass man!! Poor guy. He was in the bed next to me. So I'm laying there and they let my mom and my daughter in and they wait with me til it's time for the main event. From there, I don't remember anything. In fact I don't remember them actually leaving. I don't know at what point they gave me something to either relax me or knock me out, but I don't remember anything else after that.

Next thing I do remember is feeling really super groggy, almost like I'm dreaming and I hear my surgeon, Dr. Shariat calling my name and asking me if I can talk. I say yes or mumble or something and there is so much joy in his voice when he says, "Alicia...see, you can talk!" Now I know that when he was going over the dangers of the surgery with me, he did mention that in very rare occasions the patient may lose the ability to speak, something with the vocal cords being so close to that area, but he made it sound like a very unlikely thing. But even in my drugged up state, Dr. Shariat sounded pretty damn relieved that I could talk...hmmm, maybe its not quite as rare as he led me to believe?

Anyway, I remember a nurse telling me, "hold still honey, we're going to take the tube out of your nose". What? Tube in my nose? When did they put a tube in my nose? What other tubes did they stick in me? Well actually...that one and the draining tube they put under the incision were the only ones. The draining tube was left in til the day I left the hospital. It was kind of cool too because it had this little heart shaped plastic bag about the size of my fist that fit into the pocket of my hospital gown and it was filled with bloody discharge...Oooo, cool huh?

I remember having an oxygen mask on my face and that was the worse part of this whole ordeal...it was so clammy and moist and hot and I hated it! It made me feel like I was suffocating and my face felt all greasy and gross, Ugghhhh, just thinking it about it now makes me feel like throwing up! But eventually that came off and I'm just laying there in this big room. Because I have all this stuff around my face and neck, I guess so that I don't move, all I can see is the nurse's desk and I have to pee like a son-of-a-gun! I tell the nurse and she brings me a bed pan. I'm not too thrilled with the idea of a bedpan, but when you gotta go, you gotta go. So I did the best I could and it was awful. I won't go into detail, but anyone that has ever used a bedpan will know what a humiliating, warm, wet, yucky feeling a bed pan can give you. Anyway, they remove the bed pan, clean me up and let my daughter come in to see me.

I was really groggy and don't remember if it was her and my mom, or her and someone else, but I do remember my daughter was there. Then she left and I had to pee again! See, there is just no way you can totally empty your bladder when you are laying down. So I tell the nurse again and they do the bedpan thing again and it's awful again! I finish and they clean me up again and then my daughter comes back and tells me that my other brother Jaime is there and he wants to see me because he has to leave as his oldest daughter, my niece Sarena had been in a car accident while I was in surgery. She was in her car on her way to buy her schools books for her first term at college and she accelerated when the light turned green and a GET bus driver ran a red light and hit her! Can you imaine that! April told me that Sarena was ok, but that Jaime wanted to come in and see me real quick because he had to leave to go be with his daughter, who was ok, just bumped up and possibly a broken arm. So I remember my baby brother coming in. I don't know what silliness I said to him because I don't remember much, but I know he was there!

So Jaime and my daughter leave and damn if I don't have to pee again! Anyone who knows me knows that I have a bladder the size of a pea. I can just look at water and I have to pee. I did have an IV in me with that watery stuff they give you, I forget the name but you know it has all the vitamins and minerals and crap in it, so I'm sure that was why I had to go so often. I think the nurse is a little put-out by my having to go so often so she puts the bed pan under me and she tells me, "now honey (don't you love the way they all call you honey?), now honey...you have to empty your bladder really well". Well I get a little tearful and I tell her..."I can't, I try but I can't when I'm laying down". So she says, "ok...we're going to help you up on the potty (yep, she said potty) and that way you can empty your bladder ok?"

What the heck? She's going to sit me up? Doesn't she know I just had surgery and all my innards could come rushing out of my neck? But I guess they know what they're doing and I'm just a sheep when I'm in a hospital, tell me what to do and I'll just do it. So they help me up, and it's really not too bad, none of my innards are rushing out of my neck wound or anything like that. So they leave me sitting there at the edge of the bed on the potty and I think I took a nap or something because I wake up and my bladder is empty and I'm tired of sitting up. I can't yell cause my throat hurts, so how do I get the nurse since the curtain is drawn? And now that I'm thinking about this, was this a good idea? What if I had passed out? Or some innards had started leaking out? I could have gone head first onto the floor, innards everywhere!

Gosh almighty! So I reach behind me and grab the pillow on the bed and start flinging it in front of me and nurse's come a running! They clean me up and lay me back down...ahhhh, relief! So finally, I guess I'm stabilized, my family says I was in recovery 3 or 4 hours. They take me to my room.
To be continued.....Part Three...the hospital room.

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Is My Energy Level Back? (Part One)

I've noticed for the last few months that my energy level had just dwindled away to nothing. It was all I could do to get through the work day. The only thing I looked forward to was napping on the couch. My biggest joke was to tell family and friends that I had to get home in time to take a nap before going to bed. I know they all thought I was kidding, but I was totally serious.

I figured the reason for this dramatic drop in my energy level was old age, well...ok, not old old age, just being older. I turned 50 this year and when I first went to my doctor for a complete physical I kept telling her about all the aches and pains and tiredness and she pretty much just blamed it all on my age. But...covering her butt I'm sure, she ordered a ton of tests.

One test she performed in her office was a breast exam prior to sending me to get a mammogram. During the breast exam, she noticed that I had a lump in my throat on the left side and she felt it and then had me feel it. I had not noticed it and I don't normally make it a habit to exam my own body that thoroughly, so I while I was scared she had found it, I was also happy that she had as my mom and dad have both had nodules in their throats and my mom's actually turned out to be cancerous and she had to have her complete thyroid removed.

My doctor immediately sent me to get some blood work, but that all came back negative, so she sent me for an ultrasound. That was such a relaxing test. I laid in a bed in a dark room and the technician just massaged my neck over and over with the ultrasound thingy which looked like a computer mouse with wires and things attached to project images to the screen. It was like getting a massage on my whole neck. But unfortunately that test wasn't conclusive.

The next test was one that took two days. I had to go in the first day and they had me fill out some paperwork, I was fasting and they gave me some pills to take that contained some kind of radioactive iodine, then I went back to work and didn't eat until lunch time. The next day I went back and they did some kind of test where I laid under this big flat metal plate for a long, long time. I got scared thinking that if there was an earthquake this thing would squish me and everyone would run off and forget all about me and I would just lay there squished until I couldn't breath and I would die. I'm such an optimist aren't I?

Well this test was also inconclusive for cancer but it did let the doctor know that I had three nodules on my left side and one on the right (although no one told me about the one on the right until my meeting with the actual surgeon).

So the next test was a fine needle biopsy of the nodules, which the doctor didn't tell me much about, her office basically just made the appointment and I didn't ask very many questions. I'm of the opinion that what I don't know...can't hurt me. This really drove my sister Lisa crazy during this time as she was the only one that knew what I was going through and then I didn't even have the answers to all her questions. Thank God for the worldwide web. We did a lot of research.

We looked up fine needle biopsy and in this test, they numbed the area on my left side of my throat and the put a needle in my throat 3 times to draw out some tissue to have it tested. It didn't hurt, but the last needle was a little bit uncomfortable. I watched the whole thing on a screen and it kind of looked to me like when they do liposuction on people. The doctor just jabbed the needle roughly back and forth. I guess that was to loosen the tissue, I don't know.

Anyway, after this test I had the worst sore throat I have ever had in my life. I didn't know right away it would hurt as I was still numbed, so I went to work. But when it hit...OH MY, it hurt. Not so much that people at work noticed or that I had to go home, but then I'm a toughie. This pain lasted for more than a month, by the way.

Ok, so this last test was also inconclusive. The doctor who did the fine needle biopsy said he was almost positive that there was no cancer. My own doctor told me she didn't think there was any cancer, but that she wanted them out anyway due to the family history of thyroid cancer and the fact that the nodules continue to grow and they can block your airway. In my own research of all this, I found that another one of the symptoms was energy loss, tiredness. So I wasn't just old, I was sick!

I was referred to a surgeon who told me that he didn't think there was cancer, but that he was going to go ahead and remove the three nodules on the left side and also remove the left side of the thyroid. He also said that while I was still under, he was going to send a sample to pathology and if it looked like cancer then he was going to remove the nodule on the right side and the complete thyroid, but if not he would just remove the right side nodule. He scheduled surgery for August 21st, 2008.

At this point, I figured it was time to tell my family.
End of Part One...stay tuned for Part Two...the surgery.