Tuesday, September 22, 2009

The Hippy Bees

"Imagine a dark bar, beatniks, candles, incense in the air, the sound of the bongo as you read this poem"

Aren't we all like the Hippy Bees? *bongo*
Trying to find where we belong. *bongo*
A place in the swarm where we feel it's warm. *bongo*
Away from the hive and the bees that thrive, *bongo*
with the queen and the drones.

*Finger Snap, Finger Snap, Finger Snap*
Taking a bow...Thank you, thank you!


WHAT THE HECK!!!
Is that what you are wondering right about now? What's all this talk of Hippy Bees and Beatniks and Bongos and poetry?

Actually I was just setting the stage for my first formal poetry reading.
What?
You didn't notice that was a poem above?
A poem about Hippy Bees?

Well it was. It was my first Blog poem ever, and I'm sure you are hoping my last :-)

I was inspired to write that poem a few months ago. I believe I've mentioned in previous posts that I have a bee problem in my back yard!

My whispering beekeeper came back a month or so ago and tried to climb up into the tree to place a portable beehive in the branches in hopes that the bees would move into the portable beehive and then he could just take them away rather than kill them. Unfortunately he wasn't able to get the portable beehive up into the tree because of the branches.

My bee whisperer then coined the phrase "Hippy Bees". He said these were unsociable bees that weren't happy in the hive so they left and began their own little commune where they live happily. And that my friends, is what promoted me to write the poem above. This gorgeous bee whisperer was my muse :-) Alas, my muse said he would be back later in the week to trim the branches and place the beehive in the branches...he never came back.

My bee problem has gotten bigger since that day...just take a look at these photos, you won't believe it. (click on photos to enlarge, and be careful they don't sting you!)

Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz, Bzzzzzzzzzzzzz, Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!!!!!!!!!


Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz, Bzzzzzzzzzzzzz, Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!!!!!!!!!


I told you you wouldn't believe it. It started as a small little honeycomb about 6 inches by 8 inches, now it looks like there are 8 or 9 honeycombs! Up to now they haven't been a big problem. You don't see them flying around the yard much...not only are they hippy bees, but they are lazy hippy bees!

Unfortunately, now in the morning when I get up it's still dark outside and I usually always open the bathroom window while I take my shower. Well bees like the light and they squeeze themselves through the bottom of the window screen and the ones that don't make it in just sit there on the screen buzzing and scaring the crap outta me! So ...they gotta go.

I called several apiaries. The least expensive price I was given for a beekeeper to come out and take them physically away was $450.00!!!! These are bees people; not terrorists...geesh! The lowest price I was given for someone to just come out and kill them was $150.00, but they can't guarantee they won't come back. I was devastated. That's quite a bit of thrifting treasures cash money I won't be able to use if I pay the apiary guy :-(

So I called the whispering beekeeper...and just like the gorgeous prince I've always known he was he said he would just come kill them for free and all I have to pay for is the poison which is around $20.00. Tomorrow he will come and my bee adventure will be...a distant memory.
*bongo* Aren't we all like the Hippy Bees? *Finger Snap, Finger Snap, Finger Snap*
*Silence*




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